Most running shorts make a very loud statement about themselves and we find that exhausting. The logo placement, the aggressive colour blocking, the fabric that looks like it belongs on a racing car. You end up looking like you’re sponsored by something, even on a quiet Tuesday morning jog around the park.

Black shorts sidestep all of that. They work with whatever you already run in, they don’t date, and they don’t demand attention. The ones worth buying are the ones that earn no comments at all. That is the point.

What we’ve been looking for specifically is a liner that doesn’t bunch, a waistband that stays put without digging in, and a length that sits above the knee without going full sprint track. Some of these have small pockets that actually hold a key or a card. None of them have typography across the backside.

These are shorts that respect the run and leave the performance anxiety to someone else.